Wednesday, September 17, 2008

Weekend Review

Last weekend was our stake conference. On Friday evening the youth met with for a youth fireside. Ken took Zach. The report I got was that it was a talk on morality. Ken teased me that when I have "the talk" with the kids, I just tell it how it is. When he steps in and has "the talk", he allows a General Authority to teach. Whatever...as long as it's getting done. After putting up a stink about giving up his Friday evening for another church meeting, I hinted in his ear that a trip to Sonic might be involved, his attitude changed and as he slurped on his slushie, he claimed it was the best meeting he'd ever been to. Call it bribery, I call it working.

Saturday was the priesthood meeting and the adult meeting. The talk was pretty much on finance. Then they turned it over to question and answers. When asked what the secret was to raising teenagers, Elder Robbins said, "Ask your husbands. We covered that in the Priesthood meeting." OOPS! Missed that one. Ken went out to do Marine Patrol that morning and was seriously 1 minute from home when a call came out that a boat was sinking. He turned around, hooked up the boat and went back to work, missing the Priesthood meeting. My thought was, "If your going to cover such an important topic as raising teenagers, don't give it to the men, give it to the women. They're the ones who #1)will be at the meeting and #2)are doing the raising.

Sunday we went to the General meeting. Our the two Twin Falls stakes were divided to form a new stake. We are now in the new South stake. A new temple, a visit from the prophet and now a new stake. It's all so exciting. A little personal story: I was excited for this new stake but at the same time feeling a litte hesitant also. Maybe that's not the right word. I just feel like it was like we were moving and starting all over again because I don't know very many people from the 5 other wards we combined with. I knew that I would not know the new Stake Presidency but I wanted to feel the Spirit that day as our new leaders were called. They announced them and immediately I loved them. Then they asked their wives to come bear their testimonies along with the newly called Presidency. The 2nd counselor's wife spoke and I loved her. Then the 2nd counselor spoke and I liked him. Then the 1st counselor's wife got up from the second row and walked to the microphone. As she turned so I could see her face, tears started to flow down my cheeks. Not only had the Lord heard my prayers but he had answered them and added one of those sweet tender mercies moments. This woman was sent to our family a year ago and provided the glue that I needed to hold my family together and my own life together. She is a gift from God and I love her. She has changed my life and my family. She has a smile that makes me feel safe and loved. The rest of the meeting was emotional for me. I felt very humbled.

Our Bishop was called into the Stake as a clerk so in addition to all the changes that have already taken place, we get a new Bishop this Sunday. Also, since we have been meeting in the West Stake Building, tonight we are having a moving party to move our ward to a different building until our Stake building can be built.

Wordless Wednesday

This picture has some background. So I guess it's not entirely wordless. Maybe after my explanation, you'll understand why this picture is wordless.

Monday morning I have a class on campus. I also have to put in 30 hours of classroom fieldwork for this same class. Rather than leave my little ones more than once a week, I have arranged to have them spend all of Monday morning in a day care while I go to school. It's only one day a week for four hours. Plus I'm doing my classroom hours at the older kids school so I get to spend some time with them. That's double, right?

So, Monday morning I loaded all the kids into the car to head off to school. I put my sunglasses on because it's really bright at 7:30 in the morning,depending on which way you are driving, which was into the sun. Zach was in the front seat next to me. He looked over at me and asked, "Mom, why are tears running down your face?" I just smiled at him. The kids in the back overheard some of what he said so they asked him what was going on. I motioned the finger to my lips "Shh" sign. He got it and just said, "Mom's just having a hard time being a mom today." I was.

I left my two little ones kicking and screaming, as I ran out the door of the day care. I kept thinking, "Is this worth it?"

I loved my time in the classrooms and my class is always enjoyable.

Four hours later I returned to pick up my little ones. Henry was asleep and Kate met me at the door with her backpack on and her preschool papers in her hand. She was out of there! I brought them home and laid Henry in his bed. He slept for 3 more hours. I listened to him sniffle the entire time. Kate told me all about how she didn't like following rules and how they made her stay with her class and she just wanted to check on her baby brother. Then she grabbed her cat and said she needed to spend some time with her baby brother. She climbed up next to him and I told her to be quiet and not wake him up. A few minutes later this is what I found.

 
You know the saying, "A picture is worth a thousand words....."

In defense of the day care: It is a day care run by Ken's aunt and his cousins wife teaches the preschool class. We know them very well. His aunt has allowed me to bring Kate and Henry over to do some volunteer hours with her kids so they have been there before. They are in good hands. It's just new to us and hard to leave. I really like just staying home and being a full time mom. I have been spoiled!
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Friday, September 12, 2008

Irish Twins

Today is my sister's birthday! We are Irish Twins. We get to be the same age every year for an entire week! My mom always told us that she was in a hurry to get here for my first birthday. In fact, she was in such a big hurry that my parents actually didn't even make it to the hospital before she was born. She was born in the car about 10 miles from the hospital. She was the cheapest baby my parents every had. We spent the next 20 years celebrating every year together. I took for granted that things would never change. It's now been 14 years since we've been together for our birthday's, which makes me kind of sad.
So, Happy Birthday Deb! I love you!

Conversation with Kate

Today Kate, Henry and I were driving to pick Zach up from school. We passed a billboard that had a picture of a nasty toilet and it says something like, "don't let your first time be here". I can't remember because I don't like it so I don't look at it. Anyways, we passed it and the conversation went like this:

Kate: Eew, that toilet makes me want to puke.
Me: Yeah, me too.
Kate: It's really gross. What's it about?
Me: Don't do drugs!
Kate: That doesn't make any sense.
Me: I know, something about if you do drugs you could end up next to a toilet like that.
Kate: Oh, cuz you shouldn't lie to Jesus huh.
Me: Right!
Kate: And Mary is his mother.
Me: Correct.
Kate: And she's married to Heavenly Father.
Me: No she isn't.
Kate: Then who's she married to?
Me: Joseph.
Kate: Oh, just like the nieghbors.
Me: What nieghbors?
Kate: The ones that I'm all confused about. I know all the songs about Jesus.
Me: Great!
Kate: (sings) "Jesus is a child of God and he was born at Christmas...Jesus and Heavenly Father really love me....and I love to see the temple" How was that song?
Me: Silly.
Kate: I'm not silly. I know everything. Slug bug red.
Me: Where?
Kate: I don't know.
Me: Do you know what a slug bug is?
Kate: Nope but I like red and Henry is such a twit.
Me: A what?
Kate: A twit!
Me: Where did you hear that?
Kate: The big kids told me all about it.
Me: What's a twit?
Kate: Henry!
Me: Oh look, there's Zach (Thank goodness this conversation is over. I'm exhausted.)

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Monday, September 08, 2008

My Story:

I had to turn in this assignment for my education class. Since I have many family that read this and probably have no clue what my major is and why I chose it, I decided to post this here for them to read. The assignment was to reflect on our decision to pursue education, tell our story, what our biggest motivators are and also, what our fears are. So, here it is...


I don’t really have a story. I just have a feeling.

I have been a stay-at home mom for the last 14 years. Before that I was surviving and just trying to move onto the next phase of my life. As a child my favorite game to play was house and school. We had a little old fashioned desk in our unfinished basement. My dad had broken chunks of sheet rock laying around that we would use to write on the unfinished cement walls. I played with my sister and since we both wanted to be the teacher, we would bring our babies to school and teach them during the day and then take them home to our bedrooms to be their mothers at night. This game continued day after day for years. I knew that all girls grew up to be good moms who taught their children.

Then I started Jr. High and I started hearing about careers choices others were making and decided that being a teacher by day and a mother in the evenings did not sound like I had set very high goals for myself so I randomly picked a career that I had heard that sounded important and from that point on, that was what I was going to be when I grew up. I was going to be an Interior Decorator. As I graduated from high school and adults and peers around me would ask me what my major in college was going to be, I would tell them the career I had chosen in Jr. High and I knew from their reactions that I had chosen a field that they approved of. I entered a University and began my first semester of college on my journey to becoming rich and distinguished. I attended my first class in my major, looked around the room at all the students I would be competing against, opened my book to my first page, and felt sick to my stomach. I knew I had made a mistake. I finished that semester and actually one more before heading home to reevaluate my future. I decided to fall back on the classes I did well in and enjoyed while I was in high school. I began taking business and accounting classes through CSI at the extension center in Burley and once again, I had the feeling that I was in the wrong major. Rather than continuing to waste my time and money, I decided to take some time off from school and just work. I was frustrated and discouraged. I had no clue what I was supposed to do.

I met my husband that next summer, was married that fall and three years later found myself with two children and moving my little family 1000 miles east to support my husband as he went back to school to complete his bachelor’s degree. The next 10 years were spent supporting him and raising my children. I always knew that I would return to school someday though, so I was always on the lookout for things I enjoyed that I could make a career out of.

While we were living here in Twin, my husband was working in law enforcement and my children were attending an elementary school where several children, of people my husband had arrested, also attended. As these children began to figure out who my son’s father was, I could see problems begin to surface. The best option, we came up with at the time, was to bring our children home for a couple of years. I would home school them until we could move and he was transferred to a different position within his work. I spent the next 4 years homeschooling my children. While I wouldn’t say our home school years were a success, I learned a lot about myself. When the time came to enroll them back into school, I found that I missed the curriculum and the constant learning environment that was in our home. I missed the assignments and the projects and I was really bored. I decided it was time to figure out my own education and go back to school.

I spent hours reading through every single major offered at CSI. I spent days reading the course requirements and the course summaries. I researched careers online and took several career placement tests. I still had no idea what to major in. I finally decided to talk to a counselor here on campus. I told him my goal was to get a four year degree. He sent me to talk to the Boise State representative and the Idaho State education representative. The Boise rep was gone to lunch so I went over to talk to the Idaho State rep first. As I visited with her, my heart started racing and my hands began to sweat and I had goose bumps on my arms. As I left her office, I had tears in my eyes. I knew that after years of searching and praying for an answer, that education was where I was suppose to focus my learning.

Coming into this class I have a lot of questions. I don’t know what I have to offer. I don’t know what my interests are. I just know that I love children and I want to do something good with my life. I know that as a mother, I have learned and grown so much from teaching my own children and they seem to be turning out okay so far. I know that in my homeschooling years, I loved the Classical learning style and since my children are back in school, I love the education and discipline programs that their charter school has implemented, so I’m thinking that direction. Beyond that, I have no idea.

I have a lot of fears. One of my biggest fears is also my biggest motivator; my emotions. I lead with my emotions and I stumble over my emotions. I hope to learn how to balance that all out. Also, I have children of my own and some days and stages I really struggle being around them. What if I feel this same way towards other people’s children? Sometimes I talk too much and don’t listen enough and sometimes I’m just really boring to be around. What if I’m just not a good teacher? Finally, I’m afraid of working outside of my home away from my children. I don’t want to take away from them. I want them to always be my first priority.

I love that our text book encourages us to stop and really ponder the answers to the questions asked. I hope that as I work through this class, the answers will continue to come. I’m scared but I am determined. My personal motto has become “Do hard things.” I’m looking forward to seeing where this road leads to.



Saturday, September 06, 2008

Another first in my book of traumatic mommy moments

One of my callings in church is Activity Days Leader. I share this calling with my neighbor and since the church we are currently assigned to is clear across town, I have happily offered up my house as our place of meeting. I really enjoy these girls and love my calling.

Yesterday, was a first for this mom....

We had the girls over to make lip gloss and talk about friendship. There is a young lady who has turned 12 but has asked if she could continue to come to Activity Days for a while. I had my suspicions as to why she was asking for this but yesterday she was very vocal about her reasons. She asked where Zach was. I told her at Cross Country practice. She said, "I know. I know everything about Zach." I looked at her funny and her little sister piped in, "Yea, she loves Zach. Look at her leg." Sure enough, on her leg she had written, "I love Zach!" I laughed. Then she showed me her arm and her hand and her notebook. Then she told me all about the posters she has made and hung in her bedroom and her locker at school and how all her books are covered with "I love Zach." She says, " I just can't help it, he's sooooo cute! I just love him so much!" I smiled, trying to recover from my shock, and said, "I agree, think he's cute and I really love him too." She laughed and said, "So we're the same." I said, "Oh no, we're not! I'm his mother. I get to love him. You're his friend and you're 12." I wanted to add alot more things but I didn't want to look like a crazy, overprotective mother. The rest of the afternoon was more of the same from her and I managed to keep my mouth shut. When Zach got home, I met him at the door and told him to disappear. He looked at me funny, saw her and seemed to understand the unspoken message I was yelling at him through my eyes, and he headed up stairs where he stayed for the rest of the activity. I'm just a little thrown off with how forward she was with her feelings about him to me, not just as her leader but, HELLO! I'm HIS MOTHER! I also am a little thrown off with the way she dresses. I know what the styles are and I really like her so I don't mean for this to be a personal attack against her but we are talking about my 13 year old son's virgin eyes here. She was wearing a green tank top with bra-type straps and a brown bra. How do I know this? Because the brown bra straps were falling off of her shoulders along with the green tank top straps and every time she moved, her "blessings" were falling out all over the place. It was awkward for all of us, not just for me, but for the other girls as well because her bra and "blessings" were all that the other girls could talk about the entire activity. They kept teasing her all afternoon and she liked it since all the other girls are under 10 and not so "blessed" yet. I seemed to be extra sensitive that day for some reason, and did not want Zach to hear any of this conversation. We talked about it later. He thinks I'm nuts. He was a little overwhelmed with her being so vocal about everything though. I know who he likes and she isn't on his list, at least not today. So, now I'm feeling a little uncomfortable about having her come back. Zach told me I had nothing to worry about, that I raised him to have higher standards than that and to trust him. I told him I would trust him as long as he behaved himself but I didn't have to trust her or any person he choses to hang out with. And, it's my job to keep a VERY close eye on him. I was a teenager once and I know a little bit about the kind of trouble that girls can find to get into. Since I can't undo my past, I am left with using it to torture my children with. Hopefully, it all works out in the end.

In the meantime, I know some of her Young Women leaders read this.....HELP!!!