It's About Time...

Shaelynne approached me the other night just before bed. She was concerned about a little habit she has gotten into. As we discussed things she could do to change, she asked if I would start do individual scriptures study with her. We do family scriptures at night but she wants to start individual study as well. So we set a goal to read in the morning before school. We will meet at the table at 6:15 and study side by side for 15 minutes.

I'm excited to spend this time with her. I struggle with finding time to do individual things with each of my kids. I miss them all day and make great plans for when they get home but when they are finally home, it just seems like chaos with my attention being demanded so many different directions. I have set a goal to spend 15-30 minutes a day with each of my children in one on one time. That seems like so little time compared to the 24 hours that are in each day.

I just heard a commercial on BYU Radio. It was a girl talking about all the time her mother spends on her and how she works so hard. Then the song says something like..."They say time is worth money, and you sure spend a ton on me."

I worry all the time that I can't give them more things...will they regret that I have not spent money on music or sports lessons for them, will they regret not traveling to far away places, will they be upset that most of their clothes were hand-me-downs or that their mother cut their hair. I hate that my answer is always, "We don't have the money for that..." .

And so I'm going to school so that we can one day have more money. But my working will take me out of the home. Even my classes right now take my mind and time away from my family. Ken said to me the other night, "We all just want our mom to come back home..." Ouch! Maybe it's time to rethink what is really important

How much time do I really spend on my children? Maybe my time is not being spent correctly. Everything is a trade-off, done at the expense of something else. Are my current choices worth the cost? What about the future? Does this road end at the destination I really want to arrive at?

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth.

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same.

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
-Robert Frost (The Road Not Taken)

Am I going to go with them?

....Or watch them go alone?