Another first in my book of traumatic mommy moments

One of my callings in church is Activity Days Leader. I share this calling with my neighbor and since the church we are currently assigned to is clear across town, I have happily offered up my house as our place of meeting. I really enjoy these girls and love my calling.

Yesterday, was a first for this mom....

We had the girls over to make lip gloss and talk about friendship. There is a young lady who has turned 12 but has asked if she could continue to come to Activity Days for a while. I had my suspicions as to why she was asking for this but yesterday she was very vocal about her reasons. She asked where Zach was. I told her at Cross Country practice. She said, "I know. I know everything about Zach." I looked at her funny and her little sister piped in, "Yea, she loves Zach. Look at her leg." Sure enough, on her leg she had written, "I love Zach!" I laughed. Then she showed me her arm and her hand and her notebook. Then she told me all about the posters she has made and hung in her bedroom and her locker at school and how all her books are covered with "I love Zach." She says, " I just can't help it, he's sooooo cute! I just love him so much!" I smiled, trying to recover from my shock, and said, "I agree, think he's cute and I really love him too." She laughed and said, "So we're the same." I said, "Oh no, we're not! I'm his mother. I get to love him. You're his friend and you're 12." I wanted to add alot more things but I didn't want to look like a crazy, overprotective mother. The rest of the afternoon was more of the same from her and I managed to keep my mouth shut. When Zach got home, I met him at the door and told him to disappear. He looked at me funny, saw her and seemed to understand the unspoken message I was yelling at him through my eyes, and he headed up stairs where he stayed for the rest of the activity. I'm just a little thrown off with how forward she was with her feelings about him to me, not just as her leader but, HELLO! I'm HIS MOTHER! I also am a little thrown off with the way she dresses. I know what the styles are and I really like her so I don't mean for this to be a personal attack against her but we are talking about my 13 year old son's virgin eyes here. She was wearing a green tank top with bra-type straps and a brown bra. How do I know this? Because the brown bra straps were falling off of her shoulders along with the green tank top straps and every time she moved, her "blessings" were falling out all over the place. It was awkward for all of us, not just for me, but for the other girls as well because her bra and "blessings" were all that the other girls could talk about the entire activity. They kept teasing her all afternoon and she liked it since all the other girls are under 10 and not so "blessed" yet. I seemed to be extra sensitive that day for some reason, and did not want Zach to hear any of this conversation. We talked about it later. He thinks I'm nuts. He was a little overwhelmed with her being so vocal about everything though. I know who he likes and she isn't on his list, at least not today. So, now I'm feeling a little uncomfortable about having her come back. Zach told me I had nothing to worry about, that I raised him to have higher standards than that and to trust him. I told him I would trust him as long as he behaved himself but I didn't have to trust her or any person he choses to hang out with. And, it's my job to keep a VERY close eye on him. I was a teenager once and I know a little bit about the kind of trouble that girls can find to get into. Since I can't undo my past, I am left with using it to torture my children with. Hopefully, it all works out in the end.

In the meantime, I know some of her Young Women leaders read this.....HELP!!!