A's Christmas Concert

Friday was the elementary schools Christmas program. A was so excited to perform. I remember as a child, the Christmas program was so fun to sing in. I remember my parents taking me to my classroom and then we would come into the gym as a class and find our seats on the bleachers. The gym was full of parents and grandparents. Then we would sing lots of cute songs and have a little program. When it was over, we would go back to our classrooms and wait for our parents. I don't remember as a child that it was that stressful of an evening. It was just fun to sing those really cute, silly Christmas songs.

So, here's how it went. Our ward Christmas party was also scheduled for the same night at the same time so S was extremely mad that she had to miss out on the yummy Christmas dinner. I had to listen to her whine and complain all evening while I tried to get everyone ready. Z just wanted to sleep and K was working late so I was unsure of what time he would be home or if he would make it at all. At the last minute, A said that we had to go to the high school because that's where the program was going to be at. I quickly found the announcement. Yep! It's at the high school which is clear across town. K came home, S quickly faked a change of attitude to avoid a run-in with her father and Z woke up in time to realize that it was important to show his little sister some support.

We pulled into the high school auditorium parking lot which only has enough parking for about 10 cars and there is a line of people clear out to the road. It was like we were going to some sold out concert. K dropped us off and went to find parking. It was 18 degrees outside, Ka forgot her coat in the car, and we had to wait outside in the cold for 20 minutes. They said to have the kids there at 6:30 but they kept the doors locked until 6:45. I'm standing in freezing cold temperatures with 6 children in a crowd of 1000+ other freezing, upset families and my coat is wrapped around Ka. I completely forgot about how cold H must have been. Finally they opened the doors and it was a stampede to see how fast we can all get through the two doors (out of 8) that they opened. Once inside, parents were trying to find where their kids were suppose to be, everyone was fighting over seats, I was trying not to loose any of my kids, and K was lost somewhere parking the car. He called me on my cell to find out where we were. It went like this:

K:Where are you?

L:In the auditorium

K:Duh! Where?

L:In the middle.

K: Where in the middle?

L:I don't know. In the middle. On the end. Kind of towards the back.

K:Great! Now I know right where you are.

It was chaos!!! Then each grade came up on stage and sang one...ONE! song about something holiday-ish. And then they all sang a final song together at the end. It was the weirdest concert ever. Of course, A's grade sang last so we had to endure all 6 other songs. That doesn't sound like many but they were painful to listen to, and there was an awful narration that the older kids read through that had basically nothing to do with Christmas or any of the songs. It took more time to get the kids on and off the stage than it did to sing their one whole song. One grade did a rap! It was a little weird. The song leader lady was psychotic. She was dancing all over the place and completely putting on a show all by herself. I couldn't help but laugh out loud at her. She was really enjoying herself. Apparently, since she couldn't see any of us, she forgot that we could all see her backside. Funny stuff!

Thankfully, when it was all over, because the Kindergartner's were last to sing, they kept them on the stage until the parents came up and got them so we just sat and waited for everyone else to frantically try and get their kid so they could be the first ones out the door. Poor A was the last one on the stage with her teacher. I decided we were not going to be in a hurry! We were the last to leave the auditorium and then K met us out front with the car so we completely avoided all the crazy traffic.

A was cute and it was worth it to watch her have a good time singing. This next Friday is the other kids concert and I have higher expectations from their charter school. We'll see how it goes. I guess A's was like a dress rehearsal for me. I should do better at getting it right this next time. We'll see...

STORYTIME: Twas the night before Christmas...

On Tuesday morning, the girls had a dentist appointment at 8a.m. Of course, that was the morning that we woke up to black ice on the roads so I was very nervous about driving all the kids across town. K was very kind and backed the car out of the garage and put it in 4 wheel drive for me. As I came out the door, I was carrying H, coats for everyone, my diaper bag and my purse and I was leaving a little later than I had planned on leaving so that was adding to my stress. Right where my car used to me under the drivers door was a dead mouse. I almost stepped on it. I started screaming and frantically told K to take care of it. Later that morning, A ran out to the garage to get her coat out of the car. She came back in and calmly announced. Did you know there's another mouse in the garage? I just saw it run under the car. So now I am being held hostage in my house by a little 4 inch creature.

Last night, K was insistant that I needed to find him a piece of equipment that he needed for work today. I told him it was in the garage and that he would have to use something else for work because I couldn't get it for him. That was not the answer that he wanted, so I faced my fears, very bravely!!!

I put on Z's coat, because he is very brave and has had to go out to the garage for the last couple of days everytime I need something and he has never seen the mouse so it must be scared of him. I had A stand at the door and make cat noises because mice are scared of cats for obvious reasons. I had to go to the back of the garage to look. I was very careful to look everwhere and touch things cautiously. I also tried to make lots of noise. (Seriously, I wasn't sure we still had a mouse in the garage because A had reacted so calmly when she said that she had seen it earlier so mostly I was just playing with my kids.)

Suddenly, there he was! Looking me right in the eyes. He was on the same shelf I was looking in. (I made a little visual aid for you so you could get the full effect of my trauma) I started screaming and jumped on the back of the car. (It was 10:30 at night so I'm sure my neighbors love me!) I yelled for A to close the door so he wouldn't run in the house. So she did. Crap! Now I'm stuck in the garage, standing on the back of the car, all alone, screaming, with the mouse between me and the door. I can hear the kids in the house screaming also. K, being so thoughtful, decides to save energy and turned the light off in the garage. (He's very thoughtful like that!) Now I'm really screaming. I thought I was going to have a heart attack. I was really scared. I told him to PLEEEEEEASE come and rescue me. I was in serious distress. He did, sort of. He opened the garage door for me and then unlocked the front door so that I could come in the house that way. (Again, he's very thoughtful like that!)

But wait, that's the shelf with all the bread on it. HE'S EATING MY BREAD!!!!! So, K went out to investigate. Sure enough. He's been eating well the last few days! I discovered, though, that mice, when given a choice, are very picky eaters! I had a loaf of healthly whole wheat bread, a loaf of expensive white bread (not the wonderbread kind though, the healthly white bread.), a package of cheap hot dog buns, a package of Sourdough Hoagie buns and a bag of very soft yummy bagels. Guess which ones were eaten on and which one's remained totally untouched. He/She ate the EXPENSIVE white bread and the YUMMY bagels! The HEALTHLY whole wheat bread, the CHEAP hot dog buns and the SOURDOUGH buns were completely untouched and they were all on the shelf together, side by side! Can you believe it? I am so mad!!!!

This morning S asked me, "Are you as scared of spiders as you are of mice?" Good question. No! I'm not. But don't ask me why. I don't like spiders and I scream when I see them also, but I seriously was hoarse last night and this morning from screaming so hard and I really thought that I might have a heart attack when K turned the light off in the garage and I was stuck out there alone with that mouse!

So, now I am stuck in my house again. I can't go anywhere because my car is in the garage and so is the mouse and K is not here to back it out for me. I need some traps, but I can't go get any because I need my car, which is in the garage, with the mouse. I think A may have a sick day from Kindergarten today because I can't get her to the bus stop because my car is in the garage with the mouse.

Do you have any mouse traps that I could borrow? I'm being held hostage.

I guess since I'm having a stay-at-home day, I'll go work on getting that marker off my bench. It's all good around here!


P.S. I just called my neighbor and she is coming to get A to take her to the bus. Am I over-reacting? Maybe just a little bit....

Tonight A drew a picture and then K colored it all black. She has been doing that lately. Everything has to be colored completely black. Maybe she has some issues. Anyways, she was coloring it while we were reading our Christmas book tonight and she was being so quiet and well behaved. After a few minutes she brought me the picture and climbed up on my lap and fell asleep. It was so sweet.

Later, as I was cleaning up and putting everyone to bed, I noticed something on the piano bench. Who and when did this happen? ERRRR!!! Okay, history behind my piano bench. K and I bought this old piano from a family for $250 who didn't want it anymore. I love it. It's an old upright and I'm keeping it forever. But, it didn't come with a bench. After much complaining, my parents bought me a bench for Christmas two years ago. It was so pretty with a soft padded seat. I have kids and it wasn't very strong and somehow a leg got broken off. So, I was once again without a bench. Well, my parents are very good to me and my dad came to my rescue again. Only this time he didn't mess around. He took a pattern off the broken bench and then bought the wood and made me this new one last year for Christmas. It matches the piano perfectly and it is so beautiful. A perfect set and I love it even more because my dad made it for me. Okay, so as I'm looking at this spot on my bench and trying not to completely freak out, I notice that the picture looks familiar....

She had been sitting on the floor using the bench as a table to color on during the story and she had used this new permanent marker that she had found in the Christmas ornament box that came with one of the new ornaments. It bled through and now I can't get it off!!!! I tried hairspray and water. I'm afraid to be too hard on it. I don't want to ruin it. Maybe no one will notice it's there....Do you think it kind of blends in?....Dad, do you have my name for Christmas this year because...ineedanotherbench?

Isn't she so sweet when she's asleep? This is when my house is the safest, though!

Seeing Christmas for the very first time....

H's 1st Christmas!

Decorating the Tree

Each year the kids get a new ornament from K and I that represents them that year in some way. I love this tradition because then my tree is full of memories of my kids. We love to get out each ornament and talk about it and what it meant about that child the year it was received. The plan is to give the ornaments to the kids when they leave home so that they have their own beginning set of ornaments. Sounds like a nice thing to do for them, EXCEPT that I LOVE the ornaments. How will I ever let them go?

S

Z

H

J

A

K

(Sorry about the fuzzy pictures! I need to read the book and find out what I'm doing wrong. If I used the flash, the tree lights were dim, if I didn't use the flash, the kids were fuzzy. I guess it's obvious which I felt like was the most important. Hey, it took me 5 hours to string those blasted....very beautiful lights.)

Boys School Pictures

J

Z

Finding Christmas....

I was so excited to open a big yellow envelope that came in the mail the other day. It's Christmas time and who doesn't love to get packages in the mail. The package was from a friend who lives here in town. I had very mixed feelings about what I found inside: an instructional dance DVD and a water bottle and a Christmas card! About a year ago, I had loaned her a DVD for her home school and one of my kids had forgotten a water bottle at her house. Throughout this past year I have seen her occasionally at the store and we've sent email fwd:'s back and forth but nothing really personal. As I looked at the contents she had sent, I could hardly believe they were worth the $2.49 that she had paid to ship them. I know that her life is VERY busy and it's hard to make an extra trip across town and I am thankful that she thought about mailing them or it may have been another year before one of us got around to making the effort to get together. Don't get me wrong here. I really appreciate her thoughtfulness and her effort to return the items.



I have really been thinking alot since though about what relationships and people and our time are really worth. I thought about how much I really do miss visiting with my friend but as our lives have gone different directions this last year, so has our friendship. I have read many stories about days long ago where family's would spend the holiday evenings traveling by horse and sleigh or wagon to go visiting neighbors, friends, and families to bring them gifts and share homemade treats and just spend time with one another. Our lives seem to go by us in fast motion and we either go with it or we get left behind. But why? We have cars that are warm and fast, we have appliances that are very convenient, we have grocery stores on every corner so supplies are readily available, we have unlimited recipes and gift ideas at the touch of our fingers through the Internet, we have telephones, cell phones, pagers, Internet, etc. so we can reach anyone, anytime, anyplace. It's so easy to stay in contact with people now. So why do I feel so alone and like such a failure?



I have really struggled with my own Christmas Spirit for the last several years. I want to enjoy Christmas like I did when I was a child. I loved spending hours staring at the lights on the tree and I really loved it when my mom would let us sleep under the tree (but not on Christmas Eve!) The homemade ornaments were so beautiful and so loved. The excitement of finding and wrapping that one perfect gift for our family gift exchange. Answering the doorbell and seeing a neighbor bringing homemade goodies. YUM!!! Delivering our own homemade treats to neighbors and singing song after song out in the cold because we loved to sing together. (Our poor neighbors!) I loved Christmas Eve and reenacting the Christmas Story and singing Christmas Carols for hours with Grandma's and Grandpa's and all our family. My favorite was getting up on Christmas morning and seeing how beautiful the tree looked, knowing that Santa had been up all night making everything perfect so that my first glimpse of Christmas would be timeless. The anticipation of opening gifts, one at a time so that we could all enjoy each others gifts and then spending the rest of Christmas break playing in the snow!!



Now my Christmas Season is spent stressing over making sure that every child isn't disappointed with their gifts, but that I don't spend too much on one child and not enough on the other, and that the gifts are pretty even in number so that no one feels cheated out of a present while trying to stay within a reasonable budget. It seems to take days to get all the decorating done and then I worry constantly about something getting broken or someone getting hurt. By the time I make goodies for all the neighbors and then get them delivered, I am exhausted and what I pictured being this wonderful family tradition has turned into an unpleasant family outing that everyone avoids. I do not like to wrap presents anymore. I worry about all the extra little costs that end up being spent like tape and wrapping paper and bows. I can never make the presents under the tree look beautiful for Christmas morning, and by Christmas morning, I'm so exhausted that I just want to sleep the rest of the day. Then all the weeks of careful preparation takes 20 minutes to undo and then it seems I'm left with cleaning up, throwing away and cooking for the rest of the day. By the time it's all over, I almost hate Christmas and I'm happily looking forward to Valentine's Day.



I want to slow my life down and take the time to enjoy this holiday season. I want to make people feel that they are important to me. I want my children to love Christmas like I did when I was a child. I don't know how to do all the traditional things that I really love doing but take out MY stress so that we can all enjoy the spirit of Christmas. Is that possible? I know that Christ is the true spirit of Christmas but how do I find that balance as a mother? What do you do to keep the holidays in perspective?