Brainwashing my children?

Yesterday I took my older boys to the dentist. No Cavities!! Yeah!! The dentist, who is a family friend, mentioned to me that he had asked Z if he brushed his teeth twice a day. Z had hesitated in giving him an answer. I said, "Maybe you should ask him if he brushes once a day." He turned to Z and Z proudly says, "Well, I brush on Sunday mornings before church because my mom won't let me pass the sacrement unless my teeth are white!" The dentist has a moment of shock and then kindly tries to remind Z that he is a big boy now and that means that he shouldn't have to wait for his mom to remind him to brush. J pipes up and says, "Well, I only brush when mom says my breath stinks!" They were both told they had room for improvement in the teeth brushing area. Twice a day! Our dentist then turned to me and asked me if I had my hands full with these two. I smiled proudly! Yep. Those are my boys!!!

During my 2 hour wait, the receptionist started asking me about the school that the kids go to. She is interested in putting her "genius" daughter into a school that is more challenging. Her biggest concern was the schools policy on celebrating holidays. She said that her and her husband grew up in different religions and in their own family, they have agreed that no religion would be practiced. She said that so much brainwashing is done to children through religion. That children don't even know that the things they believe and do daily come from religious beliefs. She said that they do not celebrate any holidays because all holidays are religious. She went on to explain that if we teach our children to be thankful at Thanksgiving time, that we are teaching them to be thankful to a god.



Tagworld Thanksgiving Pictures
That then brainwashes them into believing or not believing in a god before they are old enough to have a choice. I asked her if she was atheist. She said no, that she believed in God but that she would not force her children one way or the other. Besides, atheists believe that there is no god, which then makes that a form of religion. My understanding is that "God" is just non-existant in their home and in her children's lives.

I had never thought of it that way. (I guess my parents did a good job of brainwashing me!) I tried to imagine having no belief in anything. No holidays to look forward to, no hope, nothing.

I listened my children sing "I am a Child of God" for Family Home Evening. I listened to their simple, sincere prayers on the food and for our family. One of my children was approached by a friend at school with some pornography so we discussed choices and consequences. I realized that in every conversation, every act, every thought, the center is our belief in God! From the receptionists perspective, I have totally brainwashed my children.

As I have thought more about this, my goal is not to "brainwash" my children. My hope is to give them tools to use to find out answers for themselves. I want them to trust their own feelings. I want them to be happy and to find purpose in their lives. I want them to have confidence in their decisions. I want them to know that every choice has a consequence, good or bad. I teach them the things that I believe but I want them to believe for themselves, not because I do.

Is this "brainwashing?"



What do you think?

Another Sunday

After being up with H all night, we headed out early this morning for what has become our every other month visit to the E.R. with him. Not a big deal this time...just croup.

H...a little bit of medicine and he's out for a long winters nap! Poor sick baby!

After a couple hours of quality bonding time in the hospital, K and I were anxious to get home and go back to bed. We needed to go to Target to get H's medicine. While we were in the store, I suddenly felt very ill. (Probably because I was shopping on Sunday!) I headed off to the bathroom while K bought our stuff. I totally hated that feeling of being sick in a public restroom. There was a lady in the stall next to me, and an employee cleaning, and I had the stall that had the air freshener right above the toilet. Too Many Smells!! I hate sitting on a public toilet but the thought of putting my face down there to puke was more than I could handle. I JUST WANTED TO GO HOME!!!! I somehow convinced myself I was okay and quckly got out of there. I came home and slept for several hours. When I woke up, the house was clean! The dishes were done, the kids were all quietly playing and K was making lunch.

Z..He wouldn't tell me what he was up to. Hum...suspicious!

J...a little too happy to be cleaning his room? Hum...very suspicious!

Girls....Coloring turkey's for my fridge. Love them! Thanks girls!

I thought I was dreaming! K is a better mom than I am! So, here's my big question of the day...WHY AM I THE MOM? It comes so natural to him. Is this a joke? (I am in no way complaining. I just wish I could pull it all together effortlessly like he does. He definately learned that from his mother!)

K ended the day with Hot Chocolate and Brownies.

This is K's solution to not spilling on the table and still being able to hold the hot cup.

Thanks K for all your hard work today! I love you!

Can you feel the love?

A and K were fighting this morning. I made them sit down and play the "I love you game". They have sit on the floor, facing each other and take turns telling each other "I love you" while giving something (ie. fish crackers or m&m's) to the other person until the food is gone or they are no longer mad. They usually end up laughing and it really turns into alot of fun. This morning I didn't have any treat to share so I told them to give a kiss on the cheek each time they said "I love you". Seems easy enough. This is how it went.

Me: A you go first.
A: I'm not kissing her.
K: You better kiss me or I'm going to kick you in the face!
Me: O.K. Let's look one more time for a treat. I'm sure we can find something.

A's 2007 school picture

S's 2007 school picture

Report Card: Parenting 101=F!

Lesson on how to build self esteem
OR
The right way to correct bad behavior:

Conversation with Z when he got home from school yesterday:
Z: Hey mom, my neck hurts!
Me: Why?
Z: I was head banging with my friends on the bus.
Me: Huh?
Z: I was the best! I did it three times. They said that I did it the best of anyone so they wanted me to do it one more time. My neck popped that last time and now it really hurts. I think my head might fall off.
Me: Hey Z, why don't you go over there and hit your head against the brick wall. I bet you'll do it the best.
Z: Mom, do you know what head banging is? It's not hitting heads against something. It's, like, listening to really loud music and shaking you head really hard.
Me: Yea, I know what it is. Druggies do it!(thinking to myself: Are you retarded?)
Z: Mom, I'm not retarded! and my friends aren't on drugs!
Me: Did I say that out loud?
Z: Mom, be serious here. My neck really hurts. What should I do?
Me: The next time they tell you to do something that may hurt your body, say "No thanks, I'd rather not."
Z: I'd get beat up if I talked like that. Seriously, I need you to act like the mom and tell me what I should really do.
Me: Well, I don't care how you say it, just don't do it again. Go take some Tylenol and lay down for a while.

This morning before school:
Z: Mom, I'm not going to head bang anymore.
Me: Good!
Z: Do you care if I still pop balloons?
Me: What are you talking about?
Z: Watch. I need some of your ziploc baggies though.
(Z blows up a baggie with air and them attempts to pop it.)
K: Z, stop being a dork!
Z: I'm not a dork! Why am I a dork?
K: Cuz you're doing dorky things lately!
Z: Like what?
K: Head banging and popping plastic bags!
Z: That doesn't make me a dork!
Me: The bus is here! BEHAVE!
Z: FINE!!
Me to K: (sarcastically) I think we handled that pretty well!

Poor kid! I hope the rest of his day goes better! I'm sorry that he has to be our first child. I hope he survives his parents immaturity.

The longest day of the year!

What do you get when you combine Daylight Savings Time and Fast Sunday?

In my before-kids-life: An extra hour for me to sleep or play out late with my friends.

In my dream-mommy-world: An extra hour to clean or study or bake or do something wonderful for my family or myself.

In my this-is-the-real-world-life: Just a REALLY LONG DAY!!!


H was up all night. I kept looking at the clock thinking, okay it's almost time to get up. He gets up every morning at 6:30 because that's when he hears the kids getting ready for school. So, on Sunday morning he was up at 6:30 ready to play, only it was 5:30. We don't have church until 12:00 so no one wanted to be up that early! The rest of the day just seemed to drag. We were ready for church, really early. I teach in the Primary and we are practicing for our program so for 2 hours the kids just sang the same songs over and over. It was a lot of work because they don't really know them. I thought it would never end. I kept asking if we could do another wiggle song. I felt like a tortured little kid. Then we had to sit through Sacrement meeting. The little ones were hungry because the time change messed up their lunch time, the big ones were hungry because they were fasting. Everyone was really tired! I thought that the meeting would never end. I kept watching the clock. The hands never moved! That night, I was so excited to put the kids to bed. I had the BIGGEST headache! I called everyone in for family prayer. K said, "It's only 6:30. You can't send them to bed this early." Oh yeah? So we read out of the Friend magazine for a little while and then I sent them all to bed at 7:00. I have no idea what time every one fell asleep. I do know that H was up again at 5:30 ready to play on Monday and again today! Some of our clocks have been changed, some of them have not. We have no idea what time it is around here.


A 25 hour day sounds wonderful....or does it?

Be careful what you wish for. It may not go quite the way you had planned.

I really wish that President Bush would plan the time changes on the same weekends at General Conference! That would really help me out alot. Maybe if Mitt Romney becomes president, someone could suggest it to him. Wait! He has kids. His wife has probably already thought of it!


P.S. I do have something new to be happy about. We finally got the bus to pick the kids up and drop them off in front of our house! Now I don't have to drive them to the bus stop in the morning and they don't have to walk home after school. It was a 1/2 mile away. Not too bad of a walk but when the bus pulled up right in front of our house this morning and I was bare foot and still in my pajamas with my car still in the garage and I didn't have to worry about leaving the 3 little ones home alone for 15-30 minutes, I was really thankful!